High Tech

Life has been meandering along as we all wait for the CFA test day to arrive. Until we collectively become a chartered financial family, we have been enjoying the hilarious details of modern life.

1. She is obsessed with calling me “Mommy.” She hears all her friends calling their mamas by “Mommy” and thinks it is just so cool. She picked up a puzzle piece the other day and told me that “this puzzle piece is upset.” I asked why and she replied, “Because he wants his Mom and Dad to pick him up.” I said, “Oh, he wants his Mama and Papa?” She said, “No. Mom and Dad.” End of story.

It’s everywhere. In every storybook, it’s all about mommy and daddy and she knows it. Even though I insert “Mama” and “Papa” when I read her stories, none of her babysitters do on Saturday night. She’s got my number and the jig is up. All hope of being called mama can’t be lost though. I figure I have a tiny shot of being mama until kindergarten if I don’t let on to how much the sound of mommy irks me. If she figures that out, I’m sunk.

2. It’s a small feat but I just catapulted myself into the modern era by upgrading my cell phone from an old enV2 with a cracked screen to one that can access … (wait for it) … the Internet. It doesn’t mean that I have actually accessed the worldwide web though. I’m afraid. It’s too much, too soon. Such power and information at your fingertips feels so futuristic. I’m still infatuated with the touch screen. Plus, I know that once I start, I’ll fly right by my monthly megabyte limit so I’m saving it up for a Google emergency.

Who this really affects is my brother, he’s my poor man’s iPhone. I just call him when I’m lost in the car and ask him to use his iPhone in VA to look up directions for me up North.

3. Sit down. We bought a new TV. Yes, we upgraded from the $300 “flat screen” CRT which we bought the year we were married (2001) with an employee discount from Circuit City. (Figure that one out.) So really, it’s a $500 TV from 2001, a little less embarrassing, no?

The tube actually burned out while I was watching The Amazing Race and we couldn’t avoid replacing the dinosaur any longer. Hopefully this one will last another decade. I must say, it’s quite nice.

As he fell under the spell of the lit screen, Mr. Banks said, “It’s like we advanced 10 years in technology with one purchase.” I said, “It’s not like we did. We just did. That’s what happens when you keep a TV that long.”

She Doesn’t Even Know Him

As usual, we all forgot to bring our toothbrushes on our trip out of town. That’s what happens when you put a toddler in charge of packing the oral hygiene products. So we had to do the obligatory run to the drugstore for the family. While the adults got the Walgreens brand, Lolo got a Crest Sesame Street toothbrush with a little picture of Elmo on it just because that’s what they had. It’s very different from the plain, translucent, BPA-free, marketing-free, excitement-free one she uses at home, and it’s now the top pick of our bedtime routine. She actually giggles with joy when I give her the toothbrush to use. (This is a dramatic shift from the normal closed mouth clamp she displays when we whip out the old toothbrush.)

What’s funny is she doesn’t even know “MehMo” in a real way. Lolo does get a set amount of TV each day (gasp!) but we never sit down at the same time to watch so she sees what happens to be on PBS Kids or Noggin at the time. She loves Sesame Street but he’s not always on so she sees him less than occasionally. (And Mama also likes to watch YoGabbaGabba.) But, this is how it starts. Before I imagine a future of cartoon character bedroom decor, I’ll rest easy with her simply gazing at a toothbrush and cackling like she’s getting away with eating cake for breakfast, which really would be fine if it was whole wheat cake.